For women interested in personal growth, the lessons never stop with ourselves. Everything we do and think has an affect on us, which in turn affects the people around us. Especially the children in our lives.
As Barbara Fredrickson discusses in Positivity: Top-Notch Research Reveals the 3-to-1 Ratio That Will Change Your Life (the featured book summary for June – accessible on the members page starting June 1), a positive attitude isn’t just about feeling good. People who can focus on the positive have a greater chance of flourishing in life. They are healthier, more resilient, and more open-minded. (You’ll have to read the book summary to learn about the scientific research that supports those statements.)
I’ve never m
et a woman, whether she had children or not, who didn’t think about how the world, “real life”, cynicism, etc. affects the kids in her life.
When you equip children a positive outlook, you’re setting them up for a happy and successful life.
Think about it – who is more likely to be successful?
- The girl who believes she can achieve anything, become whomever she wants, and follows up with swift action, or:
- The girl who complains about anything, is indifferent about everything, and gets nothing done out of feelings of hopelessness?
Obvious, right?
You see, children have such an amazing ability to learn. They’re babies one day, and the next they’re learning language and life skills at a rate much faster than any adult can. This gives all of us the opportunity, and sometimes overwhelming duty, to help kids develop a positive outlook on life.
There are many things you can do each day to foster a positive outlook in children, but having a positive outlook yourself is the most important thing you can do to help them grow. Even if they aren’t your own children, let them know they make a positive difference in your life and love them unconditionally.
Keep the following tips in mind to help your children develop a positive outlook:
Lead by example. From a young age, children pick up on more than you know. While you may live by the notion that you should always put your kids first, you also have to concentrate on your own self-development. Because, when you think positively, so will your kids. (I probably didn’t even need to say this to anyone who qualifies as a personal growth princess. )
Watch your reactions. Just as with leading by example, you must watch your reactions, especially when things go awry. If someone gets hurt or you learn some bad news, it’s OK to be sad – after all we want to be real – but don’t sink into the urge to have a negative reaction. If you yell or outwardly worry, you’ll affect your children. Outwardly thinking about possible solutions is a great way to role model a positive attitude.
Teach children that sometimes things don’t go our way, but eventually the tides will turn.
Find the silver lining in challenges. As children learn and develop, they’ll be faced with all sorts of challenges. Some of them will be easy, while others are more challenging. Be sure to point out the silver lining in any challenge a child may be facing. It will help them develop resiliency and become more aware of possible options or opportunities.
(See the Wednesday Wow quote by David Neagle.)
Help children change their thinking. When a child is in the midst of a tough challenge, she may bring up the idea of giving up. Do your best to bring wisdom to the situation to determine if she just needs a little nudging in the right direction. Perhaps there’s an angle to the problem she just hasn’t tried yet.
Nudge them in the right direction until they find the success they seek.
Promote laughter. Laughter breeds happiness and positive feelings. Every child has a unique sense of humor. Play into their humorous side by promoting situations she finds funny.
You can play games, go to shows, or simply have a good time together.
I know that sometimes I spout out lofty goals. OK, so I do it a lot. But that’s because I’m on a mission – a mission to help women (and by association, everyone they know) how to love and appreciate themselves more; to recognize that to be someone you are not is to waste the person you are.
That’s why I’m talking about kids even though I don’t have any of my own. (I’m an enthusiastic aunt to a great boy and girl!) They are our future. And if we’re honest, we’d really like kids to not have to go through everything we’ve gone through.
When you treat children in a calm, loving, respectful manner, they’ll be more likely to do the same. And more loving, respectful people there are on the planet, the better.
In the end, there’s no right or wrong way to raise kids. Do what’s best for the kids in your life, in the way you know how. When you focus on positivity, kids will follow right along!
What suggestions do you have for helping kids develop a positive outlook? Leave a comment below!
June 26th, is national “Take Your Dog to Work” Day. Not that a princess needs an excuse to take her dog with her, mind you, but sometimes she might need permission if she works in a traditional office setting. Enter the official holiday!
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