Try these suggestions to change your life today – no strings attached:

1.    Start a blog. It may seem silly, but blogging has changed thousands of lives. Blogging provides you with a platform to be heard and admired, while you make new friends. On your blog, all of your thoughts are heard. Create a blog today by using our sister site BasicBlogSetup.com, or by using one of the many free services available online such as WordPress.com.

•    Snag a theme for your blog that suits your personality. I recommend the themes at iThemes.com, especially Builder, (that’s the theme I use for PersonalGrowthPrincess.com0> I like Builder best because it is the most flexible and you can make it look virtually any way you want, without having to know any special web design skills.

•    Blog about your hobby. Cooking, crafting, decorating, and fashion are all hobbies with a large blogging community. In addition, racing, fantasy football, and self-development are also equally popular in the blogging world.

•    The easiest way to enrich your blog is to add photos. Add photos of your daily life or your hobbies. However, blur out all personal information (e.g. house number in the background of a photo) in pictures to protect your privacy.

2.    Make the cut. Change your life in a matter of minutes by simply removing negative influences from your life. Those who bring negativity into your life, cause harm to you or your family, or make you feel uneasy should be chopped from your mental priority list immediately.

•    Life is too short to wait around for unmotivated people to change their character. Some people only intend to channel negative energy. Keeping them around will only make the burdens, worries, and sadness in your life heavier.  That doesn’t mean you are better than them or should look down on them. Rather, just remove the influence from your life.

•    Choose on a case-by-case basis the best approach to take with each person. Some may benefit from hearing the truth and may hopefully realize your point of view. Others will simply be too stubborn to cooperate. The only person you can control is you. You may have to remove them from your life.

3.    Tend to your health. Maintaining a healthy weight makes you less susceptible to a myriad of health issues. You’ll also look good, feel good, and increase your confidence by maintaining a healthy weight. Start changing your body today by becoming more active.

•    Do it now. Why wait until tomorrow? Changing your life starts with this one simple step. Therefore, refrain from depriving your health the benefits of leading an active lifestyle any longer.

•    Dust off your old shorts and walking shoes and go for a brisk walk around the park. Even if you haven’t been active for quite a long time, a brisk walk is gentle enough, yet potent enough, to make a difference in your weight if followed regularly.

•    Get into the outdoors. It’s far more inspiring and rejuvenating to exercise in the great outdoors when compared to staring at the blank grey walls of a crowded gym.

As you can see, changing your life can require an action as simple as creating an account with WordPress.com or going for a walk in the park. The one thing required in all of the tips mentioned above is consistency.

If you simply start a blog, tell a friend that you’re parting ways, or exercise without any real consistency, you won’t experience a significant change. Start changing your life today and remain consistent for lasting results. If you want it, chase it; taking the first step can change your life forever!

Related posts:

1. The Trophy Effect: You are not your mind – 55 minutes that will change your Life!
2. Limiting Beliefs – how do you change them?
3. My baby (my cat) is 19 years old today!
4. Helping Kids Develop a Positive Outlook on Life

Success is available to you despite challenging circumstances. It’s important to remember, also, that your self-worth is not defined by your circumstances.

What holds you back? Take some time today to question the beliefs you hold that limit your potential. If you look at a challenging circumstance as a wall that’s impossible to climb, you need a fresh perspective. Within you is everything you need to thrive and excel. The more you question the validity of your limiting beliefs, the more success you’ll experience in your life.

Think of a circumstance in your life that you believe is preventing you from something you want. Write it down, then get ready to challenge that limiting belief. If you do, you’ll begin to move toward the success you deserve.

Use these strategies to maintain a positive self-worth, regardless of your circumstances:

1.      Find the cause. What is the cause of the circumstance in your life? Sometimes, limiting beliefs can serve as warning signs that help you avoid danger. What can you learn from this so you avoid triggering a similar situation in the future?

• If the cause of your situation is unclear, ask friends and family for their input. Others see your life from a different perspective, and their input can be valuable in determining the root of your difficulty.

2.      Get past the blame game. You can often be your own worst critic. Fortunately, negative self-talk often has very little basis in reality. Choose to replace the doubts of your inner critic with more productive thinking.

• Once a negative thought has taught you its intended lesson, it has served its purpose. If you choose to hold onto those negative thoughts, they will begin to form a negative self-image in your mind. This unbalanced view of your talents and strengths holds you back.

• Instead of dwelling on negative thoughts about your circumstances, learn the lesson and resolve to move on. Find out what you can do differently to avoid a repeat of your present situation. Then, when negative thoughts enter your mind, choose to replace your self-talk with productive thoughts instead.

3.      Cut yourself some slack. Recognize that you’re human. Everyone makes mistakes, but your attitude determines your altitude in life. You are valuable regardless of your present predicament. You are worthwhile even when you slip up or falter. Your circumstances simply provide feedback and an opportunity to learn and grow.

4.      Make the most of it. When you recognize that you’re valuable despite your circumstances, you’ll begin to make the most of every opportunity. Stumbling blocks you face can become stepping stones to the success you deserve, simply by changing what you focus on.

• Instead of feeling helpless, ask yourself: “What’s great about this?” Every situation provides something of value if you look for it.

5.      Ask for help. Loved ones and friends often see strengths in you that go without notice. Ask them what they believe your strengths are. This is where your self-worth is found. Everyone has something of value to contribute.

• Once you recognize your unique talents, gifts, and abilities, you’ll see life in a whole new way. You’ll seek opportunities to use your talents to bless others. You’ll gain confidence that comes from conquering challenges that once made you cringe.
• Instead of allowing your circumstances to dictate who you are, you’ll make the rules!

6.      Live one day at a time. Despite your best efforts, some days simply provide one frustration after another. When this happens, you have a choice. You can let your circumstances defeat you, or you can choose a more positive perspective.

Resolve today to find your strengths, and to remember that your self-worth is NOT determined by your circumstances. Learn from your difficult circumstances. Instead of tying your self-worth to your circumstances, choose to see things as they really are. You were created with unique talents and gifts. When you find those gifts within yourself and put them to use, you’ll know how valuable you truly are.

Related posts:

1. Self-Doubt – 2 Causes – 2 Solutions

You betcha!

This book is one in a series of girl-empowerment books by Carmela LaVigna Coyle, designed to let little girls know that yes, indeedy, princesses can do whatever they please, and that being a princess has nothing to do with outside trappings, but with inside feelings.  Feelings of goodness and worthiness, mind you – not entitlement, beauty or putting on airs.

Cole says she was inspired to write this book after her daughter asked her the title question.  It is written for pre-school level, so be prepared for the cute, whimsical rhyming. The text consists of a mother’s rhymed answers to her daughter’s questions about princesses, such as, “When princesses laugh, do they sometimes snort?  They have manners of every sort.”

What’s great about these stories is that they expand the idea of what it means to be completely and fully all of who you are – that self-esteem is based on accepting and loving you exactly as you are – the same message inherent in everything here at PersonalGrowthPrincess.com. Considering how many messages girls (and women) get about not being good enough, not being worthy, and, of course, that being pretty is what counts, this book is a wonderful counter-message.

Here’s a snippet from Carmela LaVigna Coyle’s biography:

“Hmmmm. An uncommon princess!? What’s that all about… well it’s about YOU!! And who you are on the inside. I wrote my first “published” book for my daughter Annie after she asked me the title question. “Do princesses wear hiking boots?” We were getting ready to go on a hike in the Rocky’s when she plopped down next to me wearing denim coveralls, a pink sparkling tutu, an old t-shirt, mismatching socks and a crown askew on her head. Before I could answer her question, she fired a second one; “Do princesses have to brush their teeth?” and then a third. (Can you believe it? Hand-fed a storybook title by a four-year-old? Happens all the time, I am told.) Quickly I discovered that she was trying to learn if she, herself, could possibly qualify as a princess.

The princess in my princess series climb trees, ride bikes-fast, plays soccer, dresses up (on occasion,) does chores, and loves to be outside in nature. Sound familiar? A princess doesn’t have to be fluffy and frilly to be the real deal… unless, of course, you like that sort of thing. Anything goes, my dears. “…A princess is a place in your heart.” And the best part? You decide what that is! Or not!”

I’m always drawn to these books, in part because of all the anti-princess messages I heard growing up (along with the “not yet worthy” ones), but also because of how they can impact grown women as well. Some members of Personal Growth Princess tell me that initially they were not drawn to the name of the program, because of the word “princess”, but once they read more about it and understood they were reacting from the negative conditioning they received as young girls, they jump on board. There’s something liberating about being able to think “princess” without thinking “wimpy”.

There are other books in the series, which seems to have become a runaway hit: Do Princesses Really Kiss Frogs? and Do Princesses Scrape Their Knees? and other titles.  The rumors are the latest book in the series, Do Princesses Have Best Friends Forever?, will be out near the end of the year.

What messages did you receive about who you were as a child? And was it OK to be interested in princesses? Could you kick butt and be girly?

Leave a comment below and share your thoughts.

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1. The Princess School – the book series for empowered princesses

According to Donna LeBlanc, author of The Passion Principle: Discover Your Personal Passion Signature and the Secrets to Deeper Relationshps in Love, Life and Work, there are 5 distinct ways we deal with our fears, tap into our passions and strengths, and relate to others.

Your passion signature is the way you express your passion and seek fulfillment. When you know your passion signature – along with the pitfalls that accompany them – you no longer react to the world around you, but instead are able to respond from a place of strength, a place of passion. Your self-esteem and your confidence increase because your are operating from your natural passion.

The five passion signatures LeBlanc describes are:

The Visionary

• motivated by excellence
• optimistic
• born leader
• wants to make the world a better place

The Warrior

• thrives in leadership roles
• enjoy leading people out of struggle
• has a big heart, though it may be hidden
• loads of integrity

The Lover

• thrives in 1-1 relationships
• great nurturer
• loves to learn about other people and their lives

The Creator

• great problem solver and negotiator
• can see all sides of an issue
• helps people find common ground and understanding

The Prophet

• spiritual teacher
• have new knowledge to share with the world
• have psychic abilities, though may not have recognized them yet

Each signature, or archetype, also has what might be considered a shadow side – the way you behave when you are at your worst, in the throes of fear and reaction.

If you’re the Visionary, you may have focus so much on the vision you are trying to create that you neglect to live in the hear and now. They are so used to putting a positive spin on everything that visionaries often have difficulty being completely authentic if what they feel is less than positive. You can get stuck in the role of perfectionist.

If you are the Warrior, you tend to put others’ needs before your own. You tend to feel misunderstood by others, and have often felt betrayed by someone you trusted. You may have been described as a “bull in a china shop” at some point in your life. Because of this you also have your guard up and are quick to take on the role of a Conqueror.

If you are the Lover, not only are you great in 1-1 relationships, you may need them so much that you feel uncomfortable or afraid when you are alone (not in a relationship). You need validation and often want to be the center of attention. You may even be highly flirtatious or use sex to connect with another, hence the reason the role of vamp is the shadow side of the Lover.

If you are the  Creator, you have creative ideas that take you in different directions, making it difficult to make decisions and follow-through. You end up feeling scattered. You are also a people-pleaser, and so tend not to ask for what you need. Hence you take on the role of a martyr.

If you are the Prophet, you may have a tendency to feel unsafe, particularly if you are aware of how different you are fro others. You may isolate yourself rather than reaching out to others to ground you, in part because you are generally mistrusting.  The shadow side of the Prophet is the escapist.

Do you recognize yourself in any of these passion signatures?

If you’d like to learn more about them, be sure to check out the book summary (September 2010).

Related posts:

1. How Your Authentic Archetype Helps You Navigate Self Doubt So That You Are Free to Embody Your Brilliance…
2. September self-help book summary added to member page
3. Can a cookbook be a self-help book? [interview]

I’m thrilled to announce I’ve been invited back to Self Care Mastery for another interview – this time on the topic of Self-Doubt.

We’re going to take a different approach than usual, incorporating the authentic archetypes (signature styles) from The Passion Principle by best-selling author Donna LeBlanc.

** The Passion Principle is the featured book summary this month! You can access additional resources by visiting the Member page.
You can also read a short description about the book and book summary on the announcements page.

Sign up to attend this free telesminar at Self Care Mastery!

Most books and articles on self-doubt spend 90% of the time describing what self-doubt is and 10% of the time giving suggestions for ways to deal with it.

The problem with most approaches to self-doubt is, at best they are inane, and at worst, they reinforce feelings of self-doubt. Most self-help material on self-doubt suggest strategies that deal focus on surface issues and willpower without going beneath the surface to what’s really going and identifying strategies and keys for growth specific to your signature style.

But don’t worry – we won’t stop there. We wouldn’t want to be guilty of the same 90%/10% problem! We’ll take a look at signature styles (archetypes) and how they influence us, as well as provide keys to growth that help reframe and transform self-doubt. We’ll also take a look at some of the latest scientific research on “positivity” – and what most people do that actually decreases their positivity and sense of well-being.

In this provocative (some might even say controversial) look at self-doubt, Nina East, certified coach and Founder of PersonalGrowthPrincess.com, will lead you in a realistic look at self-doubt and the state of the self-help industry’s ideas on how to overcome it.

This teleclass/interview is hosted by Adela Rubio, a Conscious Business Mentor™ and Telesummit Producer/Host who helps conscious entrepreneurs authentically articulate their essential message and build a conscious business tribe. With five online telesummits under her belt, and more than 64 interviews with conscious business leaders, she is an expert at creating engaging and experiential online virtual events that position you as a thought leader while leveraging talent, time, and technology.

Sign up to attend this free telesminar at Self Care Mastery!

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1. Self-Doubt – 2 Causes – 2 Solutions
2. Get your free copy of The Think Big Manifesto!
3. Accepting Praise Gracefully – how it helps you…and the other person

I had not heard it…until I met Deborah Nelson, author of From Rainy Days to Sexy Nights Cookbook: Simple and Inspirational Recipes to Fit Your Mood.

Deborah is the spunky – fiery? – owner of SaucyWellness.com – with the tagline “healthy living one juicy bite at a time”. Her cookbook  is really about living a juicy life – savoring all aspects of your life – with a healthy eating twist.

Food affects everything – from self-esteem to happiness to your level of confidence.

Food creates the environment in your body – an environment of stress or an environment of peace. There are many other factors affecting stress, of course, but food is one that many of us turn to. Deborah’s goal is to help people turn to it in a way that serves their goals and soothes their souls, rather than a short term relief that creates longer-term challenges.

The recipes are divided into 4 categories: Rainy Days, Summer Sensations, Heal Me, and Sexy Nights. In the interview below she explains what these categories mean and how to use the food we select to alter our mood. She says that “food creates who you are – you choose your mood in the moment by choosing your food.”

Below is an interview I conducted with Deborah a couple of weeks ago. She has also generously agreed to provide a set of 5 recipes to members of PersonalGrowthPrincess, as well as a free complimentary consultation session. If you want some support on how your eating habits affect your mood, energy levels, weight and also your libido, I encourage you to take her up on it right away! Info is available on the Members page. (Please note, this is an additional fabulous bonus – on top of your regular monthly bonus tools.)

Here is one of my favorite recipes from From Rainy Days to Sexy Nights – in fact, almost everyone in my family has asked for a copy!
Black Bean Salad With Pineapple! (muy delicioso!)

One of the funny and paradoxical things about Deborah is that she says she isn’t really a cook. She’s obviously does cook, and she is a certified health and wellness coach, but her mission expands far beyond the kitchen. Her passion is really about helping people live truly SAUCY lives…whether it be your personal or professional life. When people are living a saucy life, they are more relaxed, more passionate, and have less stress – the biggest element of disease (and the biggest impediment to losing weight – a subject we talked about quite a bit).

You can order the book directly from her website – Saucy Wellness.com.

Be sure to leave a comment below and let me know what you think about the interview, the recipes, or the concept of a cookbook as a self-help book…

Related posts:

1. Princess Expectations: How to Raise Your Expectations of Yourself
2. What is your personal passion signature?

The frustrating paradox is that self-doubt actually creates unwavering certainty – certainty that you cannot do/say/be what you want, that you aren’t good enough, or that the risks far outweigh the possible gains.

This is because of the nasty self-perpetuating cycle self-doubt creates. You doubt yourself in a particular area so you hold yourself back from doing/saying/being something. This in turn gives you evidence that you don’t “have what it takes”, which usually gets translated to “See? I’m not good enough”.

When asked about what affects or feeds their self-doubt, readers generally pointed to two things. Given the commitment to personal growth and self-improvement members and readers at PersonalGrowthPrincess.com have I wasn’t surprised at the insight. But because this seems to be a fairly universal issue, I also was not surprised that there were very few suggestions for what to do about it.

The first element feeding self-doubt is not trusting your inner guidance, your intuition. Or perhaps it would be more accurate to say the problem is not knowing whether what you are experiencing is really inner guidance, or a fear or anxiety speaking.

We often “know” something but don’t trust that knowing. After all, how do you know when you know? This is usually a result of not practicing using this information, but can also come from trusting your intuition and ending up with negative consequences. That can magnify self-doubt.

The key distinction is that inner guidance always brings relief (sometimes coupled with excitement), almost always whispers, and never criticizes. If you hear a yelling voice in your head – and you aren’t in imminent physical danger – chances are it’s your fear talking, not your intuition.

Inner guidance can have a strong and assertive voice, but will not have an ounce of self-judgment in it.

The second element feeding self-doubt is that of being overly influenced by other people – letting their opinions – or what you imagine their opinions might be – outweigh your own perspective.

It’s important to note that there is a significant difference between seeking input from someone who has experience and skill in an area you are not familiar with, and altering your behavior or feelings about yourself based solely on what someone else thinks – or what you imagine they will think.

In fact, the imagination is often the crux of the matter. Research by Thomas Gilovich, Justin Kruger and Victoria Medevec (Journal of Personal and Social Psychology), found that most of us exaggerate the perception others will have about us – both positive and negative – or even what they will remember about us at all. We don’t just exaggerate it a little, we double it. In other words, people are half as likely to have a judgment about us as we think they are.

Talk about setting ourselves up for failure…

But wait, there’s even more…if we are contemplating someone’s opinion of us just after experiencing a failure or poor performance (in our own assessment), we exaggerate the perceived judgments even more. As if it weren’t bad enough that we are not pleased with our performance, add to the intensity of our self-doubt by imagining others’ judgments far, far beyond what is true.

Can you see how this distorted judgment can add to the slippery slope of self-doubt?

It may be hard to believe that other people actually think about us very little, but that’s the truth. So how do you change this?

Knowing you do this can provide some relief from self-doubt. People who are overly anxious about how they will come across will tend to hold back from taking action. This is generally followed by regret about not taking the action, and we’re back at the same self-perpetuating cycle. (Sound familiar?)

Just recognizing this is part of the path to greater self-confidence and self-esteem. Instead of over-exaggerating what you think people’s perceptions will be, intentionally reduce what you think they will think by at least half. Probably more. Don’t worry – you aren’t likely to underestimate.

So quit worrying about what others think about you – chances are they haven’t even noticed.
And start listening to the quieter, calmer voice when looking for inner guidance.

Put these two strategies into action and you will begin to see a shift in your self-doubt almost immediately.

If you have ideas or suggestions you can share with others, please share them in the comments section below!

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1. How Your Authentic Archetype Helps You Navigate Self Doubt So That You Are Free to Embody Your Brilliance…
2. Is Dr. Phil a Personal Growth Princess?
3. Famous Failures…how do you deal with adversity?

HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED how some people discount compliments?

“My, that’s a lovely dress you’re wearing today.”

“What, this old thing? I’ve had it for ages. I really should give it to Goodwill.”

After that you want to say, “Gee, I’m sorry; I guess you’re right. It does look a little tacky, now that you mention it. In fact, I bet you could search the world over and all the stars of the universe, and never in a billion, trillion years find a dress quite that tacky.”

Once in a speech class I conducted, I told a student that he had a beautiful speaking voice. “It has great depth and resonance,” I announced.

The student grimaced and looked at the floor. “Huh? Oh, yeah, I’ve got a cold,” he grunted.

“Wait a minute,” I said, launching into my lecture mode, “listen to yourself. You just discounted a perfectly good compliment. You denied yourself the pleasure of a little recognition, and at the same time gave me a kick in the teeth. That’s not good for either of us.”

When someone does receive a compliment gracefully, it can be bewitching. That’s how I felt speaking to a clerk in a ski shop in Vail, Colorado. When it came to beautiful eyes, she was in the Guinness Book of Records. They were light green, the color of Listermint-you could swim in those eyes for weeks and come out a Jesuit monk.

“I hope I don’t embarrass you,” I said, “but you have the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen.” Then she really disarmed me. She looked straight at me, smiled sweetly, and said with all the poise of a confident, mature woman, “Why, thank you so much. How kind of you to notice.”

When she said that I got this dopey, lovesick look on my face. My lips parted in wonder-just enough to form a classy spit bubble. All my moral fiber wadded up into a useless hairball. In an instant I fantasized the perfect speech. “Oh, please let me take you home with me. My wife is an understanding woman. Or maybe I could just hide you in the garage; where does it say she has to know every little thing anyway?” (Of course, that would never work. My wife would find out and say, “You put that thing right back where you found it.” Oh-hum.)

People sometimes get the idea that receiving a compliment with confidence is egotistical. I have a three-word response for that: BUNK, BUNK, BUNK. Receiving a compliment with grace is simply saying that you value yourself as a person. To ignore, reject, or discount a credit is nothing short of self-abuse. It is saying, in essence, I am not worthy of your attention.

Accepting compliments is important for another reason. By extending your thanks, you are returning the tribute. You are, in a small way, praising your friend’s good judgment.

I believe that loving oneself is a prerequisite to loving others. Who would want to give a shabby, unwanted gift to another? Moreover, who would want to receive it?

The next time someone gives you a compliment, look them straight in the eyes, flash the old pearly whites, and offer a gracious thank you. You don’t believe in yourself enough to do that? Pretend. It will be good for you and good for your friend.

I’m curious…what do you think? How has accepting, or not accepting praise affected you? Let us know in the comments below.

*****

About the guest blogger:

Allen Johnson, Ph.D. is the author of This Side of Crazy: 54 Lessons from Someone Who Should Know Better but Keeps Messing Up Anyway.

© Copyright 2003 by Allen Johnson and Selfhelpbooks.com. All rights reserved.

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1. How Your Authentic Archetype Helps You Navigate Self Doubt So That You Are Free to Embody Your Brilliance…

There is an important distinction that needs to be made in order to have a more helpful understanding of jealousy, one which can actually raise your self-esteem…

Jealousy is a mental uneasiness about something or someone, usually triggered by seeing or experiencing something you wish you had or wish you could do. It is an awareness of difference, and a wishing for something similar to be in your own life.

Jealousy has developed a negative connotation in part because of general cultural perspectives, but also because of the inappropriate behavior that sometimes follows. We tend to get emotion and behavior mixed up, but, jealousy, as a feeling, does not have to be negative. In fact, it can be quite positive and empowering if you look at it the right way.

Resentment, on the other hand, has a bite to it. It involves a sense of indignation, of having been wronged by the other person, and even the belief that when they have something you do not, whether it be a skill, a relationship, or a tangible item, that it has somehow made you “less than”.

Words, and therefore feelings, are defined by other words. How you define something gives it its meaning. The word “resentment” is often used to define jealousy, but that doesn’t have to be so.

If you were to choose to eliminate the word “resentment” from your definition, and experience, of jealousy, what might be different?

If you believe that you are “less than” someone who has what you do not yet have, or if you believe their having it reduces your chances of ever having it, then you are experiencing Resentment, not jealousy. Resentment has a definite self-esteem lowering quality. Not only do you feel bad about yourself because you don’t have what the other person does, you may even feel guilty for feeling resentment, setting off a downward spiral of lower self-esteem.

What if jealousy were just a signal to you about something more you want to be, do, or have? The actual person who triggered the jealous response is not as important as the desire it brings up in you. Jealousy can give you clarity about what you really want. It can help you define precisely what you want to create in your life or business. The more clear you are about what you want, the easier it is to take productive action – and one of the greatest self-esteem boosters is taking effective action.

If you believed this about jealousy, how much more gentle would you be with yourself? How much more understanding would you be of other people? How much more likely would you be to get into action because you have a “possibility” mentality versus a “lack” mentality? How much higher could you raise your self-esteem by defining jealousy in a positive way, rather than trying to eliminate it?

Leave a comment below – I’d love to know what you think!

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2. Princess Expectations: How to Raise Your Expectations of Yourself

Some might think that a woman who is vibrant and full of herself (as a Princess is naturally) would not have any issues about self-expectations. They might actually think her expectations are too high. In my decades of leading personal growth seminars I have found that sometimes it is the person who appears the most “together” and “accomplished” who needs some help dealing with her expectations of herself. She may look and be successful, but have some gaps in her levels of fulfillment.

You may remember that I personally named 2010 as The Year of Fulfillment. I did this in order to put Fulfillment front and center as the most important thing for me to focus on. (I invite you to do the same.)

Why am I focusing so much on fulfillment?

There are many things in this life we have no control over. Fortunately, fulfillment IS something we have control over. Fulfillment is a feeling, not a deed or action. And the great news is that you get to define what fulfillment means to you – your personal “conditions of satisfaction” for fulfillment.

The trick is to learn how to lead yourself to greater heights and deeper fulfillment without pushing yourself over the edge. It can be a fine balance, but one a Personal Growth Princess is up for. And, yes, you can feel fulfilled even when you didn’t “achieve” what you set out to.

While having greater expectations opens you up and make you more vulnerable to failure, there are big rewards too. It’s worth it in the end because a negative experience is still an experience that you can learn from. A positive experience may provide you with one of those life-defining moments that make you happy to be alive.

Here are some excellent ways for any princess to raise her expectations of herself:

1. Do difficult things. Contrary to popular opinion, princesses do not take the easy way out. Pushing your limits can only be achieved by doing difficult things. You might not find success right away, but when you do, it can be the starting place for doing even bigger and better things in the future. Accomplishing difficult tasks, particularly meaningful, difficult tasks, can’t help but raise your self-esteem, and by association, your expectations of yourself.

2. Expand your comfort zone. We princesses are all about treating ourselves luxuriously. But that’s not what we’re talking about here. Staying comfortable is another way of continually playing it safe. When you expand your comfort zone, you open yourself up to new and exciting things. You’ll then come to expect more from yourself just because you’re comfortable with more.

3. Challenge yourself. Set yourself up with a specific challenge or make a dare with yourself. If you’re dared to do something, you pretty much have to do it!

4. Take a survival course. Taking a survival course can show you how to get back to the basics. These courses are not just about basic survival, they can also teach you about yourself. You can learn more about your abilities and strengths, and then continue to challenge yourself in the future.

5. Learn new things. This is a natural for all Personal Growth Princesses. By definition, we love to learn new things. That’s why we buy all those books, isn’t it? Using your self-help book summaries is an easy way of broadening your horizons, and with new knowledge and skills under your belt, you’ll be able to raise the expectations of what you can do.

Having higher expectations for yourself raise your self-esteem. What you think you can achieve is very important because it decides what you WILL achieve. When you raise the bar, you enable yourself to do more and be more than before.

Try these strategies to help you raise your expectations of yourself and enjoy the pride and fulfillment that come with doing great things!

I’d love to hear what you try and how it works for you. Just leave a comment below!

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